Chillin with BG

Vegas. WPT. Bellagio. Suite. Buenos Dias. Classic.

'Nuff said.

Incompetent Valet Parkers

A couple of weeks ago I decided to spend the day at the W hotel pool here in LA. I parked my Lamborghini at the valet myself without taking a ticket, and left the key thinking I was going to be back a few hours later. I assumed as a Starwood platinum member it wouldn't be a big deal to hang out without being a guest at the hotel, but that wasn't the case. I either had to rent a cabana @ $200 or get a room for $300. So I got spontaneous and turned the trip into an overnight in-town vacation.

I checked out the next day, then went to the valet to ask for the key and drive home. The booth attendant mentioned I had to wait for a manager which I thought was weird, but perhaps related to the fact that I was asking for the key to a $200k car with no proof it was mine (the guys on shift now weren't there when I got in the day before). I said I could pull it out myself, and show someone the registration so the manager thing wouldn't be necessary, to which he replied "there's been an incident." What a dreaded response that was! My heart dropped - assuming the worst. There's been a what!? No sooner had the red vested kid said the words than I had walked down to the car to find a nice swipe across the front left bumper and fender. It wasn't as bad as I had thought, but then again it was...

I have never worked as a valet, but as I have come to understand the job it involves primarily one task: PARK CARS. I parked the car myself. So what more could I have possibly done to help these people avoid this!? Put my car in an inflatable sumo suit? Cover it in tennis balls? WTF?

The manager arrived and explained that the night before one of their employees was backing a car into the space next to mine and lightly swiped my car. He was then fired on the spot. They would've notified me sooner but didn't know how to get a hold of me. The guy was very polite and apologetic throughout our discussion but it didn't really matter. He said the company would pay for all damages (duh), and would comp my parking charges of $31 [eye roll]. The hotel also gave me 10,000 starpoints (enough for a free night anywhere anytime - again eye roll). None of this mattered either, as the incovenience and aggravation weren't worth it.

The repair will cost about $2k, the reapplication of the clear bra will cost $1k, and the diminished value of the car will come to about $5k. But the real hurt will come from them putting me in another Lambo while mine is in the shop. $2500/day at 10 days = $25,000. OUCH! Oh well, I guess in the future the parking company will be a little more stringent in their hiring practices, or practice better supevision!

Bastards.

World Series of Golf

Over the years I have played a lot of poker, and worked on a lot of poker shows. And of the many things I have come to understand about the poker subculture, one of them is that most poker players love to gamble big on just about anything. But there is one thing they all seem to gravitate towards in their thirst for alternate betting platforms: golf.

So when CBS Sports needed a color commentator for the 2nd annual World Series of Golf (http://www.worldseriesofgolf.com/), a golf-meets-poker invitational tournament, I jumped at the chance. The field was all amateur and included celebrities, poker players, and self proclaimed golf hustlers - a zesty recipe for 3 days of fun at the Las Vegas Paiute golf resort. Here were my observations:

1. The desert 30 minutes outside of Vegas is just that – desert. The course was beautiful but the conditions were hot, dry, and incredibly windy the whole time I was there. I might have spent my whole paycheck on Visine, Coppertone, and Claritin!

2. There is a big untapped market for off road spec golf carts. I can’t tell you how many times I nearly killed myself whipping around in one off the beaten path. Who can resist?

3. Golf is hard (and not as fun when you aren’t putting into motorized clown mouths). Golf is expensive. Golf is not however, a sport. It is a hobby, as most anything you can do professionally while drinking a beer and smoking a cigarette should be.

4. Rabbits, snakes, lizards.

5. Golfers like to eat and drink well. The clubhouse was well stocked with top shelf liver assassins, and a fully catered spread that far outdid any tailgate I’ve ever seen. Wine, cheese, and real food that manages to avoid the dreaded deep fryer is eatin right!

6. Sitting in the heat is as exhausting as working out on a normal day.

and finally…

7. Blogging isn’t as easy as it looks. I promise to keep on top of things more in the near future.

Show airs June 28th and 29th at 2pm (EST/PST I think) on CBS.

=)
Ali